I've been hanging out with the nuns. Every Tuesday evening I've been attending a class on Centering Prayer at the monastery in a nearby town. I am known for sometimes escaping to such places for retreat and times set apart for God but it has not been my practice to take their classes.
I've been sitting in a room with men and women from many different spiritual journeys. There is the Buddhist, the meditator who own a studio, the lesbian-Christian seeker, the historian, the Catholic retreatants (sp?) and the Protestant-no-longer-gay-identified-seeker chick. I'm in good company really. Seeking.
We perceive what we seek very differently. If I refer to what THEY seek I would depict it as "god" or, maybe, "their god." If I depict what I seek I would simply say, "God." For some, all prayer goes to the same place and to the same god. All good deeds are measured the same. All seeking will lead to the same, eventual goal.
Our teacher by video is Fr. Thomas Keeting. He really is insightful. I don't think HE believes that all seeking is the same and all seekers are going to find the same, eventual goal. He is proclaiming the God who sought us first and who longs to draw us into His embrace. THIS God made a way of approach through Jesus Christ. This is the God that Fr. Thomas proclaims.
I wonder. What will be perceived of me as this course of study progresses? I thought I was there for me and Jesus. I thought I was there to learn and I saw it that way. Today I wonder if my seeking has something to do with the others? Perhaps I'll be changed a bit. Perhaps my way of seeing others will be altered. How could I meet with God and not be changed?
I am going to be practicing how to come near to God. Good, I think.
I am reminded again from Philippians that "we are to be blameless, innocent children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation among whom you are seen as lights in the world."
Will I be seen as a light?
I want to draw near to God and be illuminated by His Presence.